"the caves" part one

i am nothing more than the dirt i produce. was this calling heavy too bear or do i just prefer the caves? i must confess, the caves are comfortable.

my purpose in guarding the caves was an idea that consumed every fiber of my being. my call was to "maintain and protect." i believed that nothing good lay within that lair of susceptibility. it was my self-administered burden to carry the torch of proclamation against the lure of nothing.

but as people approached, my warnings became but a voice of judgment rather than concern. every craving vagabond that came near had that same desire in their black eyes. like blood-thirsty zombies they would pass as if i were nothing but a mist in the air: the cry heard and the next, silence. nobody would heed my warning. was my desire not as strong as theirs? whatever it was, my voice became nothing but a voice in the desert.

i would stand outside the mouth of the cave, my shadow long and high upon the rock behind me. the sun beat down upon my brow. beads of sweat slid off my face onto the cracked floor and as the sun rose higher my shadow grew longer and my voice resembled the ground upon which i stood. my legs began to grow weary day after day. i found myself no longer standing but resting nearby upon a stump cut off from its family. the days grew strange.

sometimes i would venture into the cave a few feet, lying to myself thinking that i had heard someone speak. but there was no one. they were deep inside. it was the darkness that drew me. the relief from the sun. on the outside i have always declared my allegiance to keep the caves empty. but within my declaration lay my true sense of intrigue and desire. i could not take it much longer.

there is an ancient myth that says that deep within the caves lies a danger that will tear you to pieces. this myth is given not only to invoke fear but a sense of reason within people. but i have never really found reason worth reasoning with. so one day, i lay my torch upon the weathered ground and head deep within the caves.

posted by jon havens